IM Drabbles
by KEZandOG
Summary: James, Sirius, Remus, and Lily get to use computers and internet is Muggle Studies class, what happens when they get to use IMing? LERL JPSBRating will go up.
1. Chapter 1

**A/n: And so it starts.. the saga of IM Drabbles**

After a long day in DADA, The Marauders, minus Peter who didn't have high enough scores to get into NEWTS Muggle Studies, were buzzing because for the first time ever, Hogwarts was bringing something called "internet" to their muggle studies class, and the boys and Lily were the first class that got to use them.

"Sirius?"

"Yeah, I mean real internet...Sirius that wasn't funny at all, that joke is so old."

"Sorry flower, I couldn't help it, you set yourself up."

Lily grumbles something the boys can't understand, but James sore he hear the words next, full moon, and death.

"So Lilykins? Over the summer I heard some muggle teen-agers talking about AIM, does that have anything to do with interweb?"

"Internet and yes. AIM stands for Aol Instant Messaging. It is like talking to someone only you type and to feeds to their computer and they get what you wrote, didn't you take past Muggle Studies? That talked all about it in 6th year."

"Yeah, I know." James said smiling at Sirius.

"We just like watching you explain stuff, your eyes always look like they are rolling in the back of your head." Sirius finished for James.

"Assholes."

"Leave her alone Sirius."

"Ooh... Remmy. Got a crush?"

"Yes, it might help that I like my girlfriend of 4 months."

"Err, Right."

"Class! CLASS! Please pay attention, okay. Now we have learned all about what not to do and what to do on the internet, correct?"

"Yes, Ms. Kezadoodle."

"Very well, today we will be studying how to IM. Pick a partner and sit on different sides of the room, and if you want, you and three other people can do a 'chatroom'."

"So James, Lily, Remus? Chatroom?"

"Chatroom."

**A/n: End of chapter one, Kez will take the next chapter.**

**Review!**

**AIM SCREEN NAMES**

**SeriouslySirius-Sirius**

**Ihaveahove-James**

**BookMaster-Remus**

**My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours?-Lily**


	2. Chapter 2 Ass ratings

_SeriouslySirius just sent you a nudge!_

**Ihaveahoof says: **Hey! What was that for?

**SeriouslySirius says: **Well sorry for not liking my boyfriend gawking at somebody else's ass that doesn't happen to belong to me!

**Ihaveahoof says:** OMG! I can't believe you would think that I would do such a thing! I was checking out the trouser label!

**SeriouslySirus: **Oh yeah! That's certainly isn't what I looked like to me! Lets ask remmy!

_BookMaster has just been added to the conversation_

**BookMaster says: **Hey! I was talking to Lily!

_My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? Has been added to the conversation_

**My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? Says: **Aloha! Whats up guys?

**SeriouslySirius says: **Lily! Did you see James gawking at Snivelly's ass?

**My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? Says: **Yep, it did look that way I'm afraid, but why he would do such a thing is beyond me! He already has a fing gorgeous boyfriend!

**SeriouslySirius says: **Aww thanks Lils! You always manage to make me feel better. So Pottter what do you have to say for yourself?

**Ihaveahoof says: **I wanted to see the make of his trousers! So sue me! I think he got them from George at ASDA!

**SeriouslySirius says: **See Lils he was!

**Ihaveahoof says: **Hey Sirus if you aren't going to listen to me then I'm getting moony to defend me!

**BookMaster says: **Dude, I'm staying out of this.

**My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? Says: **Honestly Remus, don't you dare defend James! He shoudn't have been staring at Snape's ass.

**Ihaveahoof says: **I wasn't!

**SeriouslySirius says: **Yes you were!

**BookMaster says:** This is solving nothing, I have an idea!

_Severus+Lucius4eva has just been added to the conversation_

**BookMaster says: **Sev, did you notice anyone 'gawking' at your 'ass' ?

**Severus+Lucius4eva says: **Who was staring at my behind!

**SeriouslySirius says: **Potter

**My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? Says: **James

**Severus+Lucius4eva says: **Why yes Remus! I did get a feeling that someone was watching me. At the time I just thought it was Lucius, but now I come to think of it, Lucius is sititng right next to me.

_BlondeshavemoreFUN has just been added to the conversation_

**Severus+Lucius4eva says: **Lucius!

**BlondeshavemoreFUN says: **What baby? Can't you see that I'm trying to hack into the teacher's secret porn?

**Severus+Lucius4eva says:** Well forget the ruddy porn. POTTER was drooling all over my ass!

**BlondeshavemoreFUN says: **So James what you think?

**Ihaveahoof says: **Nice. I'd say round about a 7?

**BlondeshavemoreFUN says: **Oh come on! That ass belongs to me! It has to got to be worth at least a 9! Obviously no-one's ass can beat mine!

**Ihaveahoof says: **Well what do you rate Sirius then?

**BlondeshavemoreFUN says: **Oh, I'd say about a 7.

**Ihaveahoof says: **What do you mean '7'? That is some serious booty on that backside!

**BlondeshavemoreFUN says: **Yeah that is some Sirius booty, ha ha.

**Ihaveahoof says: **Enough with the 'Sirius' jokes already! Ok there is only one way to settle this! Moony what would you give Sirius and Severus?

**BookMaster says: **What are you asking me for? I don't even swing that way!

**Ihaveahoof says: **So? You're a guy that appreciates artsy stuff. You can get into the feel of it!

**BlondeshavemoreFUN says: **Yeah, what would you give them if you had to?

**BookMaster says:** Um, ok then. I give Sirius and Severus both a 7.5, no-one can beat Lily's sweet little ass.

**Ihaveahoof says: **Fair…

**BlondeshavemoreFUN says: **enough

**BookMaster says: **So we agree that we each believe our own boyfriend/girlfriend has the best ass to ourselves?

**Ihaveahoof says: **Yep

**BlondeshavemoreFUN says: **Yes

**BookMaster says: **Ok that's settled then! Hey doesn't it sound a bit quiet to you guys?

**SeriouslySirius says**: POTTER, LUPIN, MALOY!

_Ihaveahoof, BlondeshavemoreFUN and BookMaster all cower in the corner…_

**BookMaster, Ihaveahoof, BlondeshavemoreFUN all say: **Yes!

**SeriouslySirius says**: I cannot believe that…

**My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? Says: **you three would…

**Severus+Lucius4eva says: **rate our arses like that!

**SeriouslySirius says**: If you can't respect me then I'm leaving POTTER!

_SeriouslySirius has left the conversation_

**My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? Says:** Lupin! Don't you dare come anywhere near me! I'm going as well!

_My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? Has left the conversation_

**Severus+Lucius4eva says: **Same goes for me Malfoy! I don't want to see your stuckup face!

_Severus+Lucius4eva has left the conversation_

**BlondeshavemoreFUN says:** rolls eyes boyfriends…

**Ihaveahoof says: **rolls eyes Blacks…

**BookMaster says: **rolls eyes Girls…

_Severus+Lucius4eva has been added to the conversation_

_My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? has been added to the conversation_

**SeriouslySirius says**: So guys, who do you really think has the nicest butt?

**Severus+Lucius4eva says: Regulus**

**My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? Says: **Yeah, that's some mighty fine Black booty your brother has there Sirius!

**SeriouslySirius says:** Ewwwwww! Guys! He is my little brother! I'm going to be scarred for life! Ick!

**Severus+Lucius4eva says: **So? Have you seen the way he can flaunt his leather pants? Yummy…

**SeriouslySirius says: **Mummy save me now!

**My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? Says: **Oh Sirius, stop being so melodramatic!

END OF CHAPTER


	3. Sad DepressingPoor Sirius

A/n: More depressing than I thought it would be…. Sorry!

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Millions of weeks later… err… 2 weeks later back in the computer class..

**Ihaveahoof says: You know Lily, I think I got the hang of this IMing thing..**

My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? says: James… it isn't that hard..

**Ihaveahoof says: I have been thinking, if I was still your boyfriend, would your name say My-Boyfriend-has-a-hoof?**

My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? says: Err.. I don't know, why are you asking me this?

**Ihaveahoof says: Idk.. Just asking… You know, everyone looks back on ex-girlfriends and ex-boyfriends..**

My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? says: I suppose… I heard Remus dream about HIS ex-boyfriend..

**Ihaveahoof says: SIRIUS? HE DREAMS ABOUT SIRIUS!**

My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? says: That would seem to be correct.. I mean Sirius was his only other BOYfriend.

**Ihaveahoof says: Are they? Are they talking to each other? Why… Why does Sirius have that look on his face… why is Remus laughing and smiling like that! Do you think?**

My-boyfriend-is-furry-is-yours? says: NO! Merlin James, they are friends JUST friends.. Remus just winked at him…

**Ihaveahoof says: THAT IS IT!**

: James gets up out of his seat and stomps over to Sirius :

"Sirius Orion Black!"

"What?" Sirius says as he closes out of his conversation with Remus so James can't read it or pull it up.

"What were you talking to him about?"

"Nothing James, calm down."

"Boys. Boy," They look at the professor, "Please stop, some people are trying to work."

They completely ignore her.

"I am not going to calm down! You don't just smile or get that face for any one! What did you talk about?"

"Nothing! Dammit James. Learn how to trust someone!"

"No," James is talking in a voice that is calm, but to calm to be normal, "I can't trust someone that is a cheat."

"James, what are you saying?"

"I can't be with you when you are like this."

"Like what? This is me."

"Then I can't be with you."

James grabs his stuff and walks out of the room trying to hold back all of his emotions, while Sirius stands still, stunded.

Little did everyone know, Lily and Remus had the same conversation that ended the same.

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**A/n: whoa! As I said before.. This is a lot more depressing than I thought it was going to be… maybe I should have had this for my other ff…. I don't know but… wow… REVIEW!**


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